Boy do I have the solution for you! CNN.com has all the stories you need to remind you just how much Iraq is a US FAILURE. With CNN you get top story after top story showing administration incompetence, impending civil war, children horrifically maimed by war, and political buffoonery in both countries. And with CNN you will never forgot that there were no weapons of mass destruction.

But that’s not all:

Led by Anderson Cooper, our top notch scienceporters have invented the patented RhetoricReverser™ technology. The RhetoricReverser™ works rapidly to find ways to reverse rhetoric when MSM inundation of narrative fails to obscure reality. RhetoricReverser’s™ secret lies in smart nano ‘rhetoric particles’ designed to anticipate optimistic events in Iraq and immediately seek new rhetorical narratives to reverse the focus to failure.

RhetoricReverser™ can handle the even the sunniest optimistic events in Iraq. Remember the good days when Iraq was clearly a quagmire hurtling towards an inevitable civil war because of an incompetent administration’s stubbornness to make changes? Who couldn’t be depressed about Iraq then? But, then the administration changed tactics reducing military and civilian deaths, restoring order in Anabar province, and making the inevitable civil war dubious. It was impossible to avoid having the sinking feeling of hope that Iraq could succeed.

Fortunately that’s when the RhetoricReverser™ went straight to work shifting rhetorical narrative from high body counts and inevitable civil war to an intractable Iraqi government political impasse. RhetoricReverser™ senses optimistic narrative in the news and gets you focused on the negative aspects to insure you never have to deal with optimism in Iraq. With RhetoricReverser™ say goodbye to hope in Iraq forever!

That’s why CNN should be your news source for eliminating all feelings of happiness about Iraq. No matter how good you feel about Iraq, CNN has the story that will bring down that happiness and remind you it’s a quagmire from which the US will never succeed. And with the RhetoricReverser™ you can rest assured knowing you will never spend another second being optimistic about Iraq. So next time you have an excessive happiness for US success in Iraq click on over to CNN. With CNN you will never have to be happy about Iraq again.

This entry was posted on Thursday, August 23rd, 2007 at 1:34 pm and is filed under News Coverage, Iraq. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.